In spite of a lovely weekend, one during which very nearly all my choices were made based simply on my childrens' happiness (and in a non-spoiling way. yay) this morning I felt like a terrible mother.

Why?

It's not because I didn't make the girls go to bed promptly at 8pm it being the night before the first day of school-
Not because I didn't give them long lovely baths to usher in the school week (I didn't,they swam for many hours yesterday and smelled clean if a little like chlorine)
Not because I completely forgot to buy the items on the school supply list,because on Thursday night EEP's new 1st grade teacher gave me a simple worksheet entitled "My Hopes & Dreams" for me to fill out in regard to the forthcoming school year. I lost it.

So off goes EEP to school- in uniform, without My Hopes & Dreams.

I really do have Hopes & Dreams for her second year in 1st grade. Otherwise I would've sent her trudging merrily on. Nobody insisted she be held back- it was up to me. Why consider it? Because she was 4 when she started Kindergarten. She turned 5 two weeks after school started. Because the Daddyman and I would like her reading a little better before it all gets much harder, possibly squelching an inherited GREAT LOVE of reading. Because she is an amazing, dynamic, imaginative child who I would love to see be a leader in class instead of a retiring, quiet child who's just trying her best to stay afloat.

She passed all her Grade One reading levels, but the tester "got the feeling" she was guessing what the words were rather than reading them. But if she did, she guessed them right. I love that.

So we are nurturing her with one more year in first grade. She is still getting a new teacher and a new classroom. Her teacher said she was excited that EEP was in her class because since she had First Grade Experience- she could be a good leader- raise her hand a lot, and make smart choices.

I trust EEP knows what a smart choice is. I haven't been a stellar example of "smart choices".

I do raise my hand a lot.