confessions of a fanzine queen
2003-11-16 @ 11:00 a.m.
Let it not be said that I am not willing to grab a moment to update whenever possible. Whenever possible, and somewhat private. Whenever the urge and opportunity fills me, I update. I don’t know, one of those applies. I haven’t hit 100 entries yet, although I started in July- so that, I suppose, says something. I am my own editor after all. However, I certainly have never “showed any noticeably soaring talent for brevity of detail or compression of incident..” as the favorite author of my adolescence would say. So the idea that I am any kind of “editor” is a bit of a giggle. But I always have been. That was always my role. But more in a leadership manner- not really in a “Smitty we’ve got to reduce this copy before we go to print!” I was always willing to just add a page, and fill that too. As I am now. But it is my nature to edit myself before I would edit others.
In case you were wondering what all that was about, I was referring to my many excursions as a fanzine girl. I was a cutie-pie self-publisher before there was such a thing as a fanzine. It was all because of the beagle- she made me do it. She, as the baby of the family, truly was hipper to the joys of self-glorification through making a lot of noise, than I was. So Hunk o’ Junk was really her idea. Later I began others because it was a great excuse to introduce myself to people. Not including the original publication Hunk o’ Junk, I spawned Splat! (only ran 2 issues due to co-editor fall out) and Creeps (a publication that featured a co-editor named John Smith. How could I resist that on the masthead, even though I did all the work?) and I geared up one final time for a genius rag to be called “Abreast” that only reached the first draft. It was more fun to plan, than it had been to write. Although it would’ve included a review of the Smashing Pumpkins set at Lollapalooza that likened the fans to the castaways from Lord of the Flies- more than eager to dance around Piggy’s head on a stick should Billy Corrigan have wished it, and that’s a lasting impression that I believe should’ve been shared with the masses. But after the whole “riot grrl” explosion of fanzines, and after I was more familiar with self-publishing because of comics, I thought there were other people doing a better job with those things than I would. Had I thought I could have done a magazine that equaled “Bust” I would have gone right ahead with Abreast. It’s a great name for a newspaper. I do set my standards high, and as I just said to someone - I don’t make stuff just because I need it to be mine, my way. I make stuff that I can’t find already. Necessity is the mother of invention. Creativity is just an extra. I am considering adjusting that economy of expression. Because I do have great ideas. I’m just not sure that foisting them upon you is doing the world a service. And I live to serve.