some kind of fit I'm sure
2004-05-06 @ 11:59 a.m.
I am a neurotic mess today. I have an interview at 12:15, for a job that I am totally confident about but itís still an interview. Plus training starts Monday, and if I get it Iíd work M-F next week, and Iíd have Sunday off. But I donít know at what point I find out if I got it.
Sunday is Motherís Day. My family is all going to see my 96-year-old Grandmother (Nana) and they are leaving Friday. If I have Sunday off I could go. I could not be completely forgotten on Motherís Day. Because if I work, the girls will be with Sal all day, and no remembrance of Motherís Day will be made on any of their mutual part because well, because Sal sucks.
So I was resigned to Motherís Day sucking already, and then the possibility of the trip came up. And how stupid is that? Taking the girls and I along is a huge pain in the ass, and I donít really want to go on a 3 day trip to Milwaukee, I donít really want a promotion, all I really want is to not feel completely forgotten on Motherís Day.
I have managed to make a simple interview feel like some insane high-stakes craps shoot over the details of when Iíll find out if I get approved for training and if my schedule this week is changed as a result.
Cause thatís how I rollÖ
P.S.- It's turning into a full-blown anxiety attack. Each minute that passes without the distraction of e-mail or anything else is pressing down on me. I am so close to snapping and beginning to shriek "Fuck all y'all" that I can't even tell you. Jeesh.
P.P.S.-Iíve totally rethought the above now. In fact I refuse to care about anything for the remainder of today except for the compelling question of whether Barbara will be brave enough to confess to her children that the reason she asked her arch enemy Carly Tenney to join her company and help her with the Las Vegas fashion show to relaunch BRO is because Barbara is having period of sightlessness due to a rapidly growing brain tumor.
Will Paul believe her? Yesterday he said his mother ďfeasted on heartsĒ..(best line ever)
So I think we can all agree that this is a better focus.