I'm not exactly sure why though.

Because it makes you look....smarter?

Big brained. (pronounced "big brayned" of course)

I got the winning bid on the boots that appear to be made of candy.

Jordan Almonds to be exact. (I only called them grape jolly rancher boots because I like saying 'grape jolly rancher'- grape jolly ranchers are a lot darker purple.)
These are definitely the color of a jordan almond, or grape hubba bubba.

That's something to wonder about..as a kid did you like Hubba Bubba better, or Bubblicious? I bet ghosty has an opinion. I bet he remembers specifically (lover of booblay goom that he is) that Bubblicious was at first too sugary, but once chewed well changed into a really nicely textured gum for blowing. Hubba Bubba lost much of its flavor early on and had an advantage of being sort of slick and not creating issues of gum from a bubble popping to stay stuck in tiny little bits surrounding your mouth. But it also was sort of a gross slickness- and it tasted a lot like the way epoxy looks after not much chewing. It was a toss up between bubble-blowability and chewing pleasure.

I always liked snapping my gum the best, and bubble gum is awesome for this, but so are every flavor of Wrigley's gum.

Speaking of gum, my all time favorite gum is Black Jack.

It's black, and tastes like black licorice (which I adore) and it never tastes bad if you're chewing it and also drinking beer at the same time.

Which is totally a gross thing to think about, but is still completely true.

Another reason was discovered tonight as I was uploading pictures and therefore naming them and I realized that I ended up naming the above "bj fan"..

So there's that.

Naughty is always a bonus.

But now that I'm thinking of it, maybe the boots are more grape kool-aid.